The OCD Manifesto
I have O.C.D. I’ve had it my whole life and to even try to describe it leaves me chalky and dusted. O.C.D has had many faces and Ive learned to understand them all. Like a placenta, on my caudate nucleus it has grown to be part of the self. I truly believe O.C.D is one of the most misunderstood disorder’s to define. I don’t even think the words Obsessive Compulsive describe the beast and how it slowly infiltrates the brain.
This is what I was thinking while licking my wounds from an 8 month stint of O.C.D. Like a werewolf waking up with my human clothes still on, I had to slowly but surly piece my life back together. My brain completely devoured and exhausted by the check/verify repetition. My lungs destroyed by the American Spirits with there bullshit more healthy light blue packaging.
I was tired and finally coming out of the torment of O.C.D which again I renamed the beast. I fucking hated the beast, I hated it the moment it began devouring my thought patterns as a teen. Over and over it would fire fear induced scenarios, scouring my anatomic nervous system until it found a direct hit.
The direct hit I.T ( Intrusive thought) would come swiftly and seem humorous at first as it slipped into the “what if crevices” of my my Orbital Cortex. It was as if Eris the Greek goddess herself had just hurled the primal seed of turmoil into my cingulate gyrus, and now it was stealthily growing until the weeds strangled my perception of reality. The beast seams to know every pressure point, every slight twist and turn that will torment it’s host. The exhaustion of check /verify leads to total avoidance. This is when shit hits the fan because the beast now has control of you’r life. Here in an excerpt from my book describing the beast.
O.C.D Manifesto Abstract explanation of The Beast :
OCD is a coping mechanism for high stress situations. Think of your Psyche as a turtle going back into its shell and saying “no way!” “ I’m not dealing with this!”
( The turtle head is basically you having control over your brain, your thoughts, and your emotions. )
The beast steps in and says “I can deal with this!” When obviously he can’t and before you know it you've lost control of the machine = Your brain.
Suddenly you're spiraling out of control like a shot down plane with a never ending descent. You try to take back control but the beast gets mad and starts combating you with intrusive thoughts, patterns and compulsions.
This brings you unbelievable despair which in turn depletes all of your energy to fight back. After a while you try to build enough strength to grab the Joystick again and take control but the beast is relentless. Even though you're spiraling out of control he doesn't want to accept the fact that he can't fly the fucking plane! So once again he bombards you with a bullet spray of intrusive thoughts and compulsions.
The reason why I’m writing this little blurb on my book is to share my coping techniques for taming the beast. Not getting rid of the beast, but taming it. My 50 page tactical guide will first and foremost help you understand who the beast is. Next you will learn how to override the system and tame the beast. Once the beast is tamed you can learn how to turn it into your superpower.
O.C.D Manifesto: Turning O.C.D into your superpower.
